Working with college students is a very challenging task I encounter everyday. I proudly and humbly say that my means of livelihood is to listen. Yes listening. It sounds easy at first but not until one is already immersed into the whole process of it. As a Psychology graduate, I was formally educated that the delicate art of listening is a very fundamental skill of every effective counselor or psychotherapist must possess. My first counseling sessions with students were like groping in the dark - a sort of hit or miss encounters. They were like mind experiments by trying out the things I've learned from the books. I wasn't fully listening to them. My mind functions like a search engine looking for the appropriate theories to apply and the right words to say. Man, it was funny to recall those days yet far from REAL listening. Nevertheless, I learned.
Counseling is an educational experience for both the students and I. It's the willingness of us to grow, to risk, to care, to listen. A helping relationship that involves the union of polarities - despair and hope, lightness and darkness, doubt and faith, hatred and Love. Like a chemical mixture that attained neutrality from a right blend of acid and base; a harmonious concoction of fruitful talking and listening.
To listen is to Love and to Love is to Listen. Listening is a more subtle and silent form of Loving oneself and others. I listen because I have the desire to know more about you. I listen because I want to understand you better and I also need to understand my true nature. I will really pay heed in what you say for I have deep concern for you. I'm silently listening to my inner self because I Love myself. And I'm truly listening to you because I Love you.
As human beings we are fortunate for we are blessed with two ears and one tongue so that we may listen more and speak less. Listen and silent are just jumbled letters that can be counted as synonymous with each other. We are always reminded to keep silent when someone is talking in order to fully understand the other person and show respect to the one talking. One may also notice that when our two ears (pinna) are put together they take the form of a heart. It's also a constant reminder for us to listen with our hearts and not merely by our ears.
So if listening is Loving and listening is the greater part of of counseling, therefore, counseling is all about Loving. Does that makes sense my friend?
